Connecting to JOY doesn’t mean happy, oh my dog, I’m so so happy.
A joy habit means:
A joy habit supports:
A joy habit comes from:
That definition of JOY sound like something you’d like more of, then you are invited to continue on to the twelve tips.
Connecting to JOY doesn’t mean happy, oh my dog, I’m so so happy.
A joy habit means:
A joy habit supports:
A joy habit comes from:
That definition of JOY sound like something you’d like more of, then you are invited to continue on to the twelve tips.
tips for creating a joy habit
Joy does NOT mean happy
As mentioned above, JOY doesn’t mean just happy. JOY is a sense of well-being which means losing the judgement about other feelings. Being able to experience a rainbow of emotions and they flow through you. Rainbow includes anger, jealousy, sadness, and frustration.
Somatic Experiencing Trauma Therapy is HUGHLY helpful with this. I didn’t have access to my anger prior to doing quite a bit of SE and suffered greatly with the effects of repressed emotions including (and not limited to) migraines, over-eating, over-exercising and flooding with emotion when it finally did come out. I have a free class about the MAGIC of Somatic Experiencing (SE) Trauma Therapy.
Embodiment
Embodiment is a big player in the joy habit while there are many ways to get more embodied, one of my favorites is to use some of the Somatic Experiencing Trauma Therapy Techniques.
Again recommending learning more about Somatic Experiencing Trauma Therapy (SE) in my free class.
Simple is powerful
Just pausing for a minute to allow your eyes to go where they want to go (Orientation) as a regular habit is FANTASTIC for nervous system regulation which sets up well-being.
This is EASY and Simple. Please don’t allow that to diminish your perception of how powerful it is.
Ditch harsh self-judgement
Ugh. Beating yourself up through harsh self-judgement feels like the opposite of JOY.
AND ceasing the harsh self-judgement is easier said than done.
Here’s a strategy:
GET CURIOUS. Rather than assuming you suck, start to get interested and curious about the places where you are falling down. This is a practice and takes some time however it is a solid way to start massive self-acceptance.
PS- Curiosity opens the door to new unique strategies for change in all areas of your life.
I talk about this A TON in my online class, You. Do. Not. Suck.
There’s a button below.
Use the coupon code, CURIOUS for 50% off.
PS- you can watch the intro module for free to get the flavor of the course!
Learn more about you
Knowing yourself is a solid way to connect to JOY. Becoming familiar with, understanding and knowing intimately sets up self-care. Self-care creates JOY.
Astrology is my FAVORITE way to do this. I offer a FREE mini reading. No strings. FREE.
Have a Dance Party
Create playlists that you love and put them on and dance like no one is watching (they aren’t).
Notice how you feel when you do that.
NOTICE NOTICE NOTICE how you can shift your energy with music and moving.
Create a Morning Routine
In typical Freebird Fashion I don’t stick to a solid schedule on this one HOWEVER I have a menu of options that I use to start my day off with a slant toward JOY.
INTENTION is a very strong influencer. If you INTEND to connect to more JOY as you start your day, your chances of doing so significantly rise.
As with all my other habit recommendations, keep trying things until you find what works for you. AND start, restart, and restart again.
The morning is the most solid time to set up JOY.
Don’t spiritually bypass
Between the BLISS BUNNY- “everything is great… all. the. time.” and DEBBIE DOWNER – “life sucks and then you die” is an advanced human practice of holding space for BOTH aka embracing paradox.
You can be SAD and THANKFUL.
You can be ANGRY and REGULATED.
You can look for the POSITIVE while noticing what is UPSETTING for you.
Do I do this perfectly? Not at all.
Do I continue to practice? Yep.
Does the practice help?
Yes and a great deal of being able to continue practicing is a result of massive trauma therapy work (which I needed to be able to do this, so, you know, just sayin)
What’s Going WEll!
I often repeat this to myself in a sing song voice… “What’s Going Well?!? 🎶 🎵
Keeping in mind #8 about spiritually bypassing, this is a tip to connect to what IS working. By the way, picking up this habit is a way to SOLIDLY SUPPORT other habits forming and sticking.
HOW: Look for, notice and repeat to yourself (or others) what IS going well.
Often as we are making changes we are constantly looking for where we want to be rather than how far we have come and where we are NOW.
Noticing progress and connecting to it by naming it, giving thanks for it and celebrating it, supports more JOY and keeps you moving in the right direction.
Plus, who doesn’t want to have more celebrations in life?
Inviting all your parts to the party
We have many parts to our amazing selves.
It’s very hard to accept some of the young, needy, anxious parts however they are part of us and full integration is KEY to more JOY.
HOW: Name your parts.
Example: There’s a part of me that is needy. There is a part of me that is competent. Often the needy part is young and needs compassion from the competent part. So I will ask the needy part, what can I do for you? The competent part can often lend a hand or at least just listen.
This is a VERY cool practice that sets up self-compassion.
There are a lot of ways to go deeper into this (I would be thrilled to help you) AND I also recommend Debbie Ford’s book, the Dark Side of the Light Chasers as a solid start.
Play the game of who you really want to be
Humans LOVE games.
Making a game out of connecting to who you really want to be is super powerful (and fun) when played on a regular basis.
How to PLAY:
There were a lot, a lot, a lot of minutes and days where I was terrified because losing my home, my gym (which was my job) and my end of life savings was quite unpleasant. However, I would play this game and it made life a little bit easier and certainly I would connect (for a time) to a sense of well-being.
Don’t go it alone
There are many people who want and need to be there for you on your joy journey.
A lot, certainly not all, however a lot of people feel more JOY when they are helping others. Allow yourself to (slowly if this is triggering) receive some help.