Tips for
creating a

Connect to peace regulation joy

Connecting to JOY doesn’t mean happy, oh my dog, I’m so so happy. 

A joy habit means being able to connect to a sense of well-being.

A joy habit supports nervous system regulation which reduces anxiety

(or at the very least normalizes anxiety and provides tools to work with it).

A joy habit comes from increased self-awareness, self-acceptance and is the beginning of self-love.

That definition of JOY sound like something you’d like more of… continue on to the tips.

tips for creating a joy habit

Joy does NOT mean happy

As mentioned above, JOY doesn’t mean just happy. JOY is a sense of well-being which means losing the judgement about other feelings.  Being able to experience a rainbow of emotions and they flow through you.  Rainbow includes anger, jealousy, sadness, and frustration. 


Embodiment is a big player in the joy habit while there are many ways to get more embodied, one of my favorites is to use some of the Somatic Experiencing Trauma Therapy Techniques.

I have a FREE video class on this- Button Below.

Simple is powerful

Just pausing for a minute to allow your eyes to go where they want to go (Orientation) as a regular habit is FANTASTIC for nervous system regulation which sets up well-being. 

This is EASY and Simple.  Please don’t allow that to diminish your perception of how powerful it is.

Ditch harsh self-judgement

Ugh.  Beating yourself up through harsh self-judgement feels like the opposite of JOY.  

AND ceasing the harsh self-judgement is easier said than done.

Here’s a strategy:

GET CURIOUS.  Rather than assuming you suck, start to get interested and curious about the places where you are falling down.  This is a practice and takes some time however it is a solid way to start massive self-acceptance.

PS- Curiosity opens the door to new unique strategies  for change in all areas of your life.

I talk about this A TON in my online class, You. Do. Not. Suck. 

There’s a button below.

Use the coupon code, CURIOUS for 50% off. 

PS- you can watch the intro module for free to get the flavor of the course!

Learn more about you

Knowing yourself is a solid way to connect to JOY.   Becoming familiar with, understanding and knowing intimately sets up self-care.  Self-care creates JOY.

Astrology is my FAVORITE way to do this.  I offer a FREE mini reading.  No strings.  FREE.

Dance Party

Create playlists that you love and put them on and dance like no one is watching (they aren’t). 

Notice how you feel when you do that. 

NOTICE NOTICE NOTICE how you can shift your energy with music and moving.

Create a Morning Routine

In typical Freebird Fashion I don’t stick to a solid schedule on this one HOWEVER I have a menu of options that use to start my day off with a slant toward JOY.

As with all my other habit recommendations, keep trying things until you find what works for you.  AND start, restart, and restart again.

The morning is the most solid time to set up JOY.


  • Meditation
  • Pull tarot card
  • Create a gratitude list (write it or say it) 
  • Get Somatic (strike a power pose)
  • Drink a glass of water and look around noticing how blessed you are to have a home 
  • Read something that inspires you
  • Get outside and MOVE!

Don’t spiritually bypass

Between the BLISS BUNNY- “everything is great… all. the. time.” and DEBBIE DOWNER – “life sucks and then you die” is an advanced human practice to hold paradox.

You can be SAD and THANKFUL.

You can be ANGRY and REGULATED.

You can look for the positive while noticing what is upsetting for you.

Do I do this perfectly?  Not at all.

Do I continue to practice?  Yep.

Does the practice help?  Yes and a great deal of being able to continue practicing is a result of massive trauma therapy work (which I needed to be able to do this so just sayin)

What’s Going WEll! 

I always repeat this to myself in a sing song voice… “What’s Going Well?!? 🎶 🎵 

Keeping in mind #8 about spiritually bypassing, this is a tip to connect to what IS working.  By the way, picking up this habit is a way to SOLIDLY SUPPORT other habits forming and sticking.

Look for, notice and repeat to yourself (or others) what IS going well.  

Often as we are making changes we are constantly looking for where we want to be rather than how far we have come. 

Noticing progress and connecting to it supports more JOY and keeps you moving in the right direction (while enjoying the journey).


Inviting all your parts to the party

We have many parts to our amazing selves.

It’s very hard to accept some of the young, needy, anxious parts however they are part of us and full integration is KEY to more JOY.

HOW:  Name your parts.

Example:  There’s a part of me that is needy.  There is a part of me that is competent.  Often the needy part is young and needs compassion from the competent part.  So I will ask the needy part, what can I do for you?  The competent part can often lend a hand or at least just listen. 

This is a VERY cool practice that  sets up self-compassion.  

There are a lot of ways to go deeper into this (I would be thrilled to help you) AND I also recommend Debbie Ford’s book, the Dark Side of the Light Chasers as a solid start.

Play the game of who you really want to be

Connecting to who you really want to be is a game that is super powerful (and fun) when played on a regular basis.

How to PLAY:

  1. Start by pretending that this life situation you are currently in is actually a big game. (When I was divorcing, I would pretend that I, Angela Freebird, signed up for this BIG upheaval and it was exciting!!)
  2. Imagine the coolest version of yourself in the game. (I would pretend that I was all Zen, playful and totally capable of starting everything over at age 48)
  3.  Embody it.  Tell a friend (someone trustworthy), write a fan letter to yourself, I had posters everywhere during the BIG upheaval.
  4. Repeat.

There were a lot, a lot, a lot of minutes and days where I was terrified about losing my home, my gym (which was my job) and my savings accounts.  However, I would play this game and it made life a little bit easier and certainly I would connect (for a time) to a sense of well-being.


Don’t go it alone

There are many people who want and need to be there for you on your joy journey.

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